I know, Dr. Phil…and have I wrote this one before in better words or in blood? If so…fuck you become my editor so this shit doesn't happen again. Anyways, I remember having some bad ass bitches say I blew it before too…and I was like wtf…and then they of course say they swallow and take it up the ass and will do any woman your bring over with you while they cook you dinner and make you money. Yeah now of course I don’t believe the half of that but it sure did sound good when they threw it out there…
I also had some I let escape since I was just not into it…its like radar..the dick will tell ya if you should tread the water or let it lie…it will for warn any disturbance in the force. Least mine does. Then there's the times…I've had two years many years ago…where I had to live with an in law who became the most powerful cock blocker since Oobi Wan Kinobi.
I had a hot black chick I worked with tell me they felt out of it and needed to lie down…I said sure ok, then as we approached my home she said to do anything I want to her..I of course..said….oh really, you know like the wolf on looney toons? Then of course in laws had their chew toy distraction in the house blocking the only means of laying down the white mans law on my new found Nubian princess lands…cock blockers one…me a huge zero and big blue fucking balls.
Then another night…same job…hot young white girl, some vh1. Yeah late,…well not so late but its like Thursday night and we are watching Motely Crue behind the music…chillin my voice is clearly low and din the mac mode. The dick has begun its accent which has most definitely shocked my company…then….Bam. The in laws come out. Sit down, note which NEVER happens. Long enough to kill both my buzz and my friends sense of adventure. Cock blockers two. Me zero. Nothing. Zilch, blue balls so blue they turned into the shadow and lived under someones bed. I think they may have even committed a crime or two…but I never ask.
So your like, hey that guy that comes here to bitch a lot is back. And I say hold on now bitch’s…before you get sent a shit smiley face in the mail and raped like your back in prison…there's a new sheriff fucking this town up. Ah so that got your attention? You needed to be over inflated self hated and ate out like a spine on a horse saw?