Where to begin....how about with Diablo 3. Yes this is a blog that's been running in Que for quite a while...live with it, maybe it will bring back some seething feeling that you had forgotten and finally convince you shotgun suicide IS the answer. That or you will read it and say oh I knew that shit, either way.
So as stated diablo 3 is out, after twelve years the qqer's love to say, not twelve in development this isn't Guild Wars 2 folks, which I think they had to invent time travel to work on since like the day part one launched they started development on it and still needed thirty nine years and twenty three and a half months to finish. Anyways, Diablo 3 sold like....five million copies day one and battle.net 2 is of course shitting the bed. People are mad and blizz is trying to fix shit quick. The question I agree with is...why the fuck didn't you have enough servers? Your not going to lose any money ffs. You just have to drag back some of that twelve year old acne repository bandwidth off wow to fill the gap.
So Ok, I wrote the above when the game came out, its been a couple weeks....yeah I decided to try to be a responsible reviewman type guy and come back to the game for your benifit. Well I have, and the verdict is.....kinda...I dont know. The games kinda boring. Maybe Im gettin to old for this shit? I mean I was twentyone when lod dropped and it was like the best piece of ass you ever had. It didnt matter fat or skinny that game had such a strong head game you kept coming back. This one? Its pretty to look at, dresses in a simliar if updated style but its lacking in the end. I suppose its a hot readhead that doesent shave low enough and wont put your dick in her mouth even though she has the whitest teeth youve ever seen.
I cant just pan all the ideas, dont get me wrong. The game is good, it feels like a continuation with a sick story and a lot of good ole diablo shit going on. But at the same time its like the son of sam and kills my good time with the departure from the old way which I probably wasted more virtual time of my life on that nes and snes combined....and by now you know how much I loved the snes....its so good if it was a woman and weighed fourhundered pounds and was seventy one and a half id still bang it....and not even deny it. Yeah Im hitting some fucked up referances here but if you have read this blog more than three times....are they really that fucked up?
Ok so in closing the verdict is....the game is good. Im just getting older and need something more given? Giving? Casual? This one is all of the above but its like a christmas gift wrapped in a grocery sack filled with dirty needles and bath salt condoms when I put it under the microscope....I love the franchise I'm just older, more stressed and a worse consumer now without the weed alcohol and cigarettes. So give it a try miliions are addicted already, just remember there aint no going back, so if you cut your dick off now....your gonna be carrying more plastic in your pocket than ironman at an islam christmas party.
So Ok, I wrote the above when the game came out, its been a couple weeks....yeah I decided to try to be a responsible reviewman type guy and come back to the game for your benifit. Well I have, and the verdict is.....kinda...I dont know. The games kinda boring. Maybe Im gettin to old for this shit? I mean I was twentyone when lod dropped and it was like the best piece of ass you ever had. It didnt matter fat or skinny that game had such a strong head game you kept coming back. This one? Its pretty to look at, dresses in a simliar if updated style but its lacking in the end. I suppose its a hot readhead that doesent shave low enough and wont put your dick in her mouth even though she has the whitest teeth youve ever seen.
I cant just pan all the ideas, dont get me wrong. The game is good, it feels like a continuation with a sick story and a lot of good ole diablo shit going on. But at the same time its like the son of sam and kills my good time with the departure from the old way which I probably wasted more virtual time of my life on that nes and snes combined....and by now you know how much I loved the snes....its so good if it was a woman and weighed fourhundered pounds and was seventy one and a half id still bang it....and not even deny it. Yeah Im hitting some fucked up referances here but if you have read this blog more than three times....are they really that fucked up?
Ok so in closing the verdict is....the game is good. Im just getting older and need something more given? Giving? Casual? This one is all of the above but its like a christmas gift wrapped in a grocery sack filled with dirty needles and bath salt condoms when I put it under the microscope....I love the franchise I'm just older, more stressed and a worse consumer now without the weed alcohol and cigarettes. So give it a try miliions are addicted already, just remember there aint no going back, so if you cut your dick off now....your gonna be carrying more plastic in your pocket than ironman at an islam christmas party.
RSS Feed
