Did I ever tell you I cant stand an open door when I'm otherwise disposed? Like sleeping...having sex...stroking it..gaming...plotting world domination.....building a time machine...eating peanut butter....
Yeah. I cant stand a fucking open door. Its like..if you leave this door open, the murderer or monster will see it somehow and be standing there...all patient and shit waiting. Hes gonna wait for you to stop typing, fucking, taking a bite...whatever....and just be there. And of course your gonna be like OH SHIT CHOKE...COUGH and hes gonna jump on your ass like Freddie did Nancy's mom. I ain't going out like that fuck that.
You know how I avoid said crissis? I shut the fucking door. I don't care what Im doing, im gonna shut this damn door. You can knock Mr. Monster...and then Ima know, hell you can shake the fuck out the door too that's cool, I got a big ass window to jump out of. Needless to say its a placebo. Door closed is safe, open is like a huge neon sign saying free fucks for the first thirty customers.
Now I know a lot of folks say you cant hear the rest of the house...or your a little kid and you feel safer with the open door. Ok true...if its like the boogie man...and he jumps out the closet you got an open door. Hes still of course gonna assault and batter your ass but you can at least share the wealth with the family if you get out. I mean you are supposed to share right?
Beside that...if I am in here..I have a gun among other effects. You can trash the house...I can sneak out of here and show you my Callahan impression. Then they will wish they had closed a door before they tried to steal my shit....check door number one asshole its got a surprise for you. And we aren't talking the kind a lot of dudes like either....*Jenner* Cough* Mac* Cough*
No with that abated....I just don't know...its like an open closet door or the curtains pulled back suspiciously....there can be no good come from it. I could go on and on..and fuck I'm grown....I been in this life. I don't need anymore green hands behind curtains or shit breathin down my neck while I play with he-man in the sink. Fuck that. Im closin doors, keepin an eye on the curtains and not playin no bullshit with any boogie men. They want it they gotta know I see it comin and I'm ready, fuck all the games.
I mean...if you want to leave your door open by all means....you put that sign up...then they have plenty of business and no time to fuck with me. I applaud your brave sacrifice!
Thank you....thank you all.
You know how I avoid said crissis? I shut the fucking door. I don't care what Im doing, im gonna shut this damn door. You can knock Mr. Monster...and then Ima know, hell you can shake the fuck out the door too that's cool, I got a big ass window to jump out of. Needless to say its a placebo. Door closed is safe, open is like a huge neon sign saying free fucks for the first thirty customers.
Now I know a lot of folks say you cant hear the rest of the house...or your a little kid and you feel safer with the open door. Ok true...if its like the boogie man...and he jumps out the closet you got an open door. Hes still of course gonna assault and batter your ass but you can at least share the wealth with the family if you get out. I mean you are supposed to share right?
Beside that...if I am in here..I have a gun among other effects. You can trash the house...I can sneak out of here and show you my Callahan impression. Then they will wish they had closed a door before they tried to steal my shit....check door number one asshole its got a surprise for you. And we aren't talking the kind a lot of dudes like either....*Jenner* Cough* Mac* Cough*
No with that abated....I just don't know...its like an open closet door or the curtains pulled back suspiciously....there can be no good come from it. I could go on and on..and fuck I'm grown....I been in this life. I don't need anymore green hands behind curtains or shit breathin down my neck while I play with he-man in the sink. Fuck that. Im closin doors, keepin an eye on the curtains and not playin no bullshit with any boogie men. They want it they gotta know I see it comin and I'm ready, fuck all the games.
I mean...if you want to leave your door open by all means....you put that sign up...then they have plenty of business and no time to fuck with me. I applaud your brave sacrifice!
Thank you....thank you all.
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