I swear everyday I get up, and do my daily....routine...not drink, barbiturates or cattle decapitation...I wonder how things get so toxic and out of control. I wonder why I spent so long with a snake in the bed.,..or why I decided I would be a good guy and pursue that path...to be some righteous person when I know good and well I already played the hand of doom. Guess we make our own beds and just hope someone else is stupid enough to lie in them with us?
That's not a question folks. Its more like a facetious statement. I mean I used to be smart. I was in control. Then I decided fuck it...Ill let loose...ill enjoy this. YOLO. Yeah fuck yeah. Then what happens? You find yourself in a sweater with a face burned like Freddie....and we aint talkin mercury here. But its so so hard to go back. Get branded never turn back...isn't that what Phil said anyways?
Ok I guess venting doesn't help, maybe therapy...then you find out you have always been right...and then you really just lose the hope they try to pound in your head to keep oiling the machine and making someone else's life better.....I mean I hear till I can scream I cant take it...I don't have to.....and I'm like..fuck all I don't either but I do......then it becomes a pessimistic statement against everyone and good living when all the order of the day is be fake and claim happiness...when all you are is a slave to an idea.
Ok that's out. Fuck it....I'm done today. I don't know if it makes sense but when it pops in my head like explosive diarrhea I have to let it all out....all over this place. And you know what...I don't give a fuck who has to clean it up anymore.