ExsanguinationSignet
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MTC

10/16/2014

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i think some of my hobbies may be dying like the honey bees or at least becoming lords of the flies.  Lost and without reason I think my hobbies may be killing one another for the simple fact that they serve no purpose.  I do like my time here...even when I do suffer the block like a clogged up sink with seventeen years of used diaphragms and a dirty diaper shoved in it.  Its the other hobbies I need to reaffirm...or confirm DOA.
I mean I work....a lot.  I do this, I was writing some...autobiographical work, some fiction, playing guitar, reading, working on pc's.....shit you name it I had a hand on it.....I shunned drinking and going out,  smoking and stroking.....a lot of that due to family matters children in the addition of course.  But still in the mean time I had hobbies, and now like a broken string I'm detached.  its one of those fuck this moments, which of course is what has always hindered my wish for fame, that and being so introverted you dig a hole in a cave to cover with your rock doesn't help any. 

Fuck it though I guess I came here to bitch like brad when he drove Angelina to the clinic.  Or when Rob Halford came out to all his fans, minus the boa, bald head, and whole gay part.  I mean did you listen to the lyrics people?  Wtf.  Turbo lover?  Living after midnight......didn't he say he was looking for men?  I dont think he meant to hang out in the  conventional way people.  Even I caught that when I was a kid.....then I saw him looking like curly from the three stooges with a boa and some fishnet shirt on and knew the end was neigh.  

Of course it was on MTV, which no doubt is capable of turning Chuck Norris and Clint Eastwood gay by now with its made for PBS bathroom elevator music pool turd evaporation of talent and foresight.  Its like catching yourself in your fly after you put aftershave on your balls. 

Bill Cosby is more racy than the crap you see over there now, Freedie Mercury Mr. rogers sweater included.  Now where was I?  Ah yes hobbies.  And the lack of them, or a few....its just a fact of growing up I suppose which I have done many many times I assure you, I think i just go through the motions with a hobby till an old one comes back to the front, so over fifty years or so I will be great at many things....but in the years in front I will suck at many things but still be "able" to do them. 

All while knowing of course that I am like the escaped con of all trades, hiding in the back of a washroom at the gas station with a pack of Marlboro's and a stack of nineteen eighty three hustlers by the bed.
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